Sick, can't fly.

Been sick for the past four days... for the past three days, I've been at home trying to get better. I thought I was going to go home yesterday, so imagine my conflicted feelings when all my body wanted to do on the last day I was in Singapore was to sleep. I think I slept pretty much the last two days away. Sigh. Luckily I managed to delay my flight without paying the penalty. Guess Cathay isn't that atrocious after all. It sucks that I can 't eat anything but porridge in my remaining days here tho. Sigh, such is life.

There is a saying in Chinese which goes like this "人言可畏", which I've found to be very true. To translate it loosely, it means the power of the words of Mankind is frightening".

I came across this letter written to me from a member of the orientation group I was taking care of in VJC days. It was from this girl called Dan Lin, who I was pretty close for a decent amount of time before we started becoming more distant.

The contents of the letter simply expressed her thanks for me taking care of her during orientation, and how she is touched by the members of the orientation group. What got me to mention this in this blog entry was that she mentioned that people had been spreading rumors about me, that I was petty, cold and bitchy. She went on to say that she was glad that she didn't believe any of those rumors, and glad that she got to know me for who I was.

I wonder what is it that spurns people to spread rumors like that? I've never tried to be a high-profile figure. I never tried to make everyone my friend. I've always been very honest with my feelings. I can't fake and try to be nice to someone I dislike. My close friends all know that, and appreciate me for my honesty. I don't think I have deliberately or maliciously tried to hurt someone just for the heck of it.

So who is it who keeps spreading rumors about me? And what is his/her motive? All my life, I just wanted a few close friends and I'm content. I don't really care, or judge what other people are doing. I'd much rather spend my energy managing my own life and caring for my loved ones. Why can't people leave one another alone?

Now that I'm older, and people around me more mature, the rumors die down. Is it because I'm in California, where people are more free-spirited and less biased? Or is it because rumors are just a mere act of childishness and immaturity? Maybe growing old has its perks, after all. Heh.